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Energetic vampires – who are they?

You might hear this term from time to time if you do a lot of research on energies and personal development.

It’s pretty straight forward. They’re the people who suck the life out of you. Those people who are so low vibe, continuously judging and criticizing, the people who generally have nothing good to say. There is nothing constructive about their opinions about you or the people around you.

Can you think of any?

I’ve definitely worked with a couple of these people.

I once had a co-worker who was so judgemental, I started to justify why I went to the gym over lunch and why I had such high goals! It was like I needed validation from him, but why?!

I can also think of a few family members who are energetic vampires. This is more than just your parents having high expectations and wanting you to do well in life, but the people who will always expect more from you because it will never be enough. I could be a multi-millionaire and instead of celebrating my success, they’ll hound you for your next steps to become a billionaire. I grew up believing I would never be good enough because of these energetic vampires. I strived to please them in every way, even if it meant putting myself last.

In reality, they are projecting their own insecurities on me. Turns out, that co-worker of mine had high expectations of supporting his mother and sisters, as he was the “man” in the family. It was his responsibility to feed and house them, but felt guilt when he consumed the food himself.

Often I let it get to me. I allow them bring down my energy. I allow them to get in my head so much that I question my own goals and existence. Let me tell you, someone who makes you questions yourself on a daily basis is not someone who is fully supportive of who you are. Family or not.

So how do we deal with them?

  1. Remove them from your life.

This is much easier said than done. There will be a lot of reluctance if you’re talking about one of your longest friends or a family member. I suggest that you weigh the positive and negative aspects of your relationship with this person. Write a pros and cons list if necessary.

I recently ended a friendship that was toxic. She was nice and had a kind heart, but would explode at the smallest thing! Most of the time the problem was miscommunication. But in the end, she didn’t speak my love language and wasn’t very supportive of me. Upon reviewing the relationship, I realized that I had spent most of our friendship giving her advice or helping her out with an issue she wanted answers for. I somehow took on this role of needing to help her, when it’s not my responsibility. I was sad when I ended the friendship and debated whether I made the right decision or not, but I think I did in the end.

  1. Ignore their opinions.

If you can’t remove them from your life, ignore their opinions. You can argue with them or stand up for yourself if you feel the need to, but remember to pick your battles. It sounds horrible, but sometimes I find that the best thing to do is “listen” (I use this word very loosely) and discount what these energetic vampires are saying. I do this often with my toxic family members. Some of them are so stubborn in their belief that “they know best” that I let them just have their little word vomit session and I shake it off.

At the end of the day, you have the right to live YOUR life how YOU please. As long as you are safe, healthy and are making somewhat wise decisions, don’t dwell on what they have to say about your life. You are on your own path in life. They’re not walking it for you, just like you’re not walking theirs.

  1. Keep a crystal that absorbs negative energies nearby

I have my black tourmaline with me wherever I go when I know I will encounter these individuals. If they really get to you, bring it with you whenever you leave the house!

Here are some crystals that protect you from negative energies:

    • Black tourmaline – known for transforming negative energy to positive and cleanses the negative energies. It repels negative energy from the receiver and gives it back to the sender. It also removes blocks like fear, anxiety and stress.
    • Smokey quartz – known to ground and remove negative energies from your aura. It absorbs negative energy and sends it to the earth, clearing you of anxiety or any burdens. Keep it at your work desk to discourage gossip and drama.
    • Black onyx – known to protect against harmful spirits and psychic attacks. It absorbs and grounds negative energies. It increases confidence and enhances intuition.

At the end of the day, these energetic vampires are projecting their insecurities on others. The key thing to remember is that you are not responsible for babysitting these insecurities.

Your only job is to live life in accordance to the Universe. If you feel aligned with the Universe, you are living your path. Keep doing that, and the negativity will diminish.